Dudes: The Cult of Cool
Feb. 27th, 2007 04:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
animereiOkay...so anyone who has been to my house knows that we have quite a library of random books in our basement. In boxes, on shelves, stacked on tables, etc - they seem to be everywhere.
So yesterday I was randomly browsing through a pile and came across a particularly odd book, "Dudes: The Cult of Cool" by Mel Green. My initial though was WTF? Is this something my dad picked up for a quarter at a garage sale?
It's only about 50 pages long and has a humorous collage on the front cover, so I started reading it. It's h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s. It's basically a manual on How to be a Dude. It also lists modern people who are dudes (including women) and people who are wannabe dudes.
This is probably my favorite excerpt from the whole book:
The Right Attitude or The Dude-itude:
(1) By all means, and under any circumstances - remain cool.
(2) Take crap from no man, woman, child or small mammal (this can also include household appliances, vehicles and plants).
(3) Never wear a jogging suit.
(4) Eliminate 'The Dull' wherever it is found.
(5) Never cause gridlock.
(6) Always carry sunglasses.
(7) Avoid winter.
My favorite is #2. Heh.
There are more funny parts in the book, but I don't feel like typing anymore. So there.
So yesterday I was randomly browsing through a pile and came across a particularly odd book, "Dudes: The Cult of Cool" by Mel Green. My initial though was WTF? Is this something my dad picked up for a quarter at a garage sale?
It's only about 50 pages long and has a humorous collage on the front cover, so I started reading it. It's h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s. It's basically a manual on How to be a Dude. It also lists modern people who are dudes (including women) and people who are wannabe dudes.
This is probably my favorite excerpt from the whole book:
The Right Attitude or The Dude-itude:
(1) By all means, and under any circumstances - remain cool.
(2) Take crap from no man, woman, child or small mammal (this can also include household appliances, vehicles and plants).
(3) Never wear a jogging suit.
(4) Eliminate 'The Dull' wherever it is found.
(5) Never cause gridlock.
(6) Always carry sunglasses.
(7) Avoid winter.
My favorite is #2. Heh.
Some other great parts of the book are:
HISTORY OF THE DUDE:
Prehistoric: Fire was discovered by a Dude when he lit his cigarette. Later that day he discovered the wheel and the hubcap.
Age of the Pharaohs: The great pyramids were originally designed as massive sunbathing platforms to be used by up to 10,000 Dudes and Dudettes at a time. The function of the shape was to allow one Dude, standing at the top of the pyramid with a hose, to spray water on all those reclining below, thus allowing them to keep their cool while coping some serious Egyptian rays. Then, with the invention of the beach umbrella, popularity waned and the pyramids were auctioned off to the pharaohs, who used them for storage.
The Roman Empire: Chariots, orgies, really cool-looking helmets. All roads did lead to Rome, hence the first major gridlock.
The Dark Ages: A very dull time for Dudes: the Plague and the Inquisition - too much pain and too many questions. Most Dudes headed for the Bahamas.
Discovery of America: Columbus establishes cruising as a viable profession.
America the Free: The British split, the slaves are freed, reggae hits the charts.
Turn of the Century: Henry Ford, tired of Dudes borrowing his car, mass produces the Model T.
World War I: Combat boots really catch on.
The Depression: Bad time for freelancing. Many Dudes headed for Paris.
World War II: Dudes hit the silk - stocking and skydiving are in.
The Fifties: Rock 'n' Roll years. Elvis, Brando and Dean consecrate blue jeans and grease.
The Sixties: The Dude is stoned.
The Seventies: The Dude is hung over.
The Eighties: Back to the Sixties.
Heh. This book was written in 1986, so that's as high as the timeline goes. I think my favs in this section are Prehistoric and Turn of the Century.
HISTORY OF THE DUDE:
Prehistoric: Fire was discovered by a Dude when he lit his cigarette. Later that day he discovered the wheel and the hubcap.
Age of the Pharaohs: The great pyramids were originally designed as massive sunbathing platforms to be used by up to 10,000 Dudes and Dudettes at a time. The function of the shape was to allow one Dude, standing at the top of the pyramid with a hose, to spray water on all those reclining below, thus allowing them to keep their cool while coping some serious Egyptian rays. Then, with the invention of the beach umbrella, popularity waned and the pyramids were auctioned off to the pharaohs, who used them for storage.
The Roman Empire: Chariots, orgies, really cool-looking helmets. All roads did lead to Rome, hence the first major gridlock.
The Dark Ages: A very dull time for Dudes: the Plague and the Inquisition - too much pain and too many questions. Most Dudes headed for the Bahamas.
Discovery of America: Columbus establishes cruising as a viable profession.
America the Free: The British split, the slaves are freed, reggae hits the charts.
Turn of the Century: Henry Ford, tired of Dudes borrowing his car, mass produces the Model T.
World War I: Combat boots really catch on.
The Depression: Bad time for freelancing. Many Dudes headed for Paris.
World War II: Dudes hit the silk - stocking and skydiving are in.
The Fifties: Rock 'n' Roll years. Elvis, Brando and Dean consecrate blue jeans and grease.
The Sixties: The Dude is stoned.
The Seventies: The Dude is hung over.
The Eighties: Back to the Sixties.
Heh. This book was written in 1986, so that's as high as the timeline goes. I think my favs in this section are Prehistoric and Turn of the Century.
There are more funny parts in the book, but I don't feel like typing anymore. So there.
